A woman, the skin around her eyes still peacock blue and black, cheeks puffed and reddened from the hits she had taken the night prior, sitting calmly with the police prosecutor, arguing against the need for an Apprehended Violence Order.

That's right, arguing against the need for protection from the man who used her as a punching bag.

It wasn't the black eyes and soft voice that broke my heart and tear me up even now.

It was the fact she lived down the road from me. Just a few houses away, yet here she was black and blue.

I had seen the paddy wagon pull up and not knowing exactly what was happening, brushed it aside as a break and enter, or 'some drama' down the road.

I had - like so many others - not given it a second thought that such a violent act was being committed so close to home.

A neighbour, a community member, possibly even another mother, a daughter, a partner.

To me, the mere fact we call it domestic related assault almost de-values the actual crime.

It's as though it's not a proper assault, but a second cousin.

It's behind closed doors.

It's not in public, caught on camera and ready for a very shockjock outcry like there is about one punch king hits.

Yet, I've lost track of the amount of time that term - domestic violence related assault - has popped up in Canobolas Local Area Command news of late.

If it's not quite a real assault, it seems to be taking up a hell of a lot of police resources. A hell of a lot.

In fact, if you look at the serious crimes record for Cowra just in my time as a journalist, every single murder victim aside from a young boy - killed with his sister and grandmother - was female. Sadly, I've covered seven plus murders.

Almost all a result of family violence in their home, one a victim of violence arguably in a residence close to home.

In all cases, either their partner/former partner or family member was responsible for their deaths, or suspected, just not proven.

Yet, no one knew of the possibility of violence beforehand. No one had a hint beforehand. Or so many said. The neighbours, the people down the road, the friends.

Since that day in court years ago now, I've made a pact to never forget.

I've attended memorial services, hugged mothers who lost their daughters, talked with people how to move forward an idea to create a women's refuge in Cowra.

I've refused to hide the crime, even though it's caused a lot of heart ache about how to protect the victim in a small country town.

I've supported with pride stories from our schools and community groups that have focused on tackling family violence and promoting safe relationships.

Our Watch is a national (government-funded but independently run) organisation that seeks to change the culture and behaviours that underpin violence against women and children.

The Cowra Guardian is joining forces to support Our Watch in its latest campaign. We want to lend our voice to encouraging a shift in culture and behaviours.

We hope you support us.

janine.finlayson@fairfaxmedia.com.au